Of Aprons and Birthdays
by Sunny Blues
Summary: Her shirtless teammates wearing her colorful aprons plus failed cake baking equals the best day in Sakura's life. Happy (very late) Birthday Sakura-chan! — Team 7 close friendship and teases. T for potty mouth language and dirty minded ninjas. Surprised? Don't be.


It was a warm day in the beginnings of Spring as Sakura made her way home from the hospital, her namesake in full bloom around her.

The rosette covered her opened mouth with her hand as she let loose a yawn, despite it being 4:30 in the afternoon. It was honestly amazing what a half day full of surgeries and a surprise emergency could do to her.

Sakura heavily sighed. _'The woes of a medic…'_

Still, she already had everything mapped out in her head as to what she's going to do at home. Once she gets there.

She could see it now, as if it was really, _really_ there in front of her: a nice hot shower, maybe for a hour or two, ready to try out her new strawberry milkshake scented shampoo… Maybe she'll even do some girly stuff Ino pestered her to do for once in her (_busy_!) life, like paint her nails with a glittery bottle of green nail polish she'd bought for her months ago… Sit down, grab some hot tea with a good book in her lap… _Sleep—_

She inwardly groaned. Damn it, couldn't her feet move faster? She bet her grandmother could _walk_ faster than her at the moment, surely.

The rosy haired woman almost laughed with wonderful relief once she saw her own abode in sight, but lazily smiled to herself instead. It was a cozy looking flat; not too oversized, not too small. Just right in her own terms.

She stood in front her door, searching for her keys in her starched lab coat—

"Sakura-chan!" a blond man welcomed her home brightly with his equally bright grin, opening (slammed) the door from the inside of her own hou—

Hold it.

_'What the fuck is he doing in **my**__ house?' _she thought, stunned eyes unblinkingly staring at her former teammate's Adam's apple in his tanned throat. _'How did he even get _inside_ in the first place?!'_

Naruto paused at her silence; and as if knowing—like always—what's the issue, he reassured:

"Spare key."

_'Oh… I forgot I gave that to him…' _she thought absently, mentally deflating that her personal relaxation map was now ripped into a million and one tiny pieces.

Before she can even gather her thoughts to say something, he pulled her inside, closed (slammed, again… she was gonna _talk_ to him about that habit) and crushed her a curiously warmer than usual hug.

"I'm so glad your home early! That means we can celebrate much more longer!" he exclaimed.

"Huh?" _Celebrate wha—? _

_'Oh, that's right. I forgot…'_

She now thinks, sullenly, that she's getting too old since she can't remember simple things now.

Naruto pulled back and Sakura automatically looked down at the loss of space between them, feeling she had to… which was a bad (_or good, perhaps…_) think to do. Completely stunned for the second time in less than a minute, her eyes just widened, and just stared.

She noticed something. Something _off_ about Naruto and why he was a lot warmer than she knew he was, being victimized by his constant hugs.

But how could she _not_ noticed this when he was standing right in front of her eyes just moments ago?

Said blonde just smiled devilishly at her hair. He was about to say something until another person appeared from her kitchen door.

"Welcome home…" she knew that other deep voice miles away. This one was much more monotone, grumpier than the other that greeted her at the door, however. She stared at the other man, emerald eyes still impossibly open to the limit now.

Then she looked back at Naruto.

Then to Sasuke.

To Naruto.

To Sasuke.

Naruto.

Sasu—

"What the fuck are you two wearing?!" She yelped, feeling a heavy blush flood her cheeks. At that point, Naruto had set her free from his embrace, allowing her to fully examine them both in their OP glory.

They both were dressed up in nothing but a pair of navy fitted jonin pants and… _her aprons._

_'The neighbors,' _Sakura thought in mind-numbing horror._ 'Oh man, what the crap will they even think?!'_ Honestly, seeing both the Hokage and his right hand man in an _apron?_ …she can only imagine.

Specifically, Naruto had on Sakura's favorite apron that consist of pink and white stripes with laces outlining the edges of it.

Sasuke's apron, on the other hand,—she inwardly laughed, manically, just looking at him—had tiny pink polka-dots littered all over the fabric and a sign that printed in curly letters: _"I'm not a chef, but just kiss me anyways." _A charming apron matched wih an equally _charming_ expression that the likes of an Uchiha can possible offer…

But the utter cuteness of the outfit was masked by their shirtless, masculine torsos that the apron barley hid.

Yeah, she's seen their bare chests countlessly from various injuries within that area, but she never really payed any mind to their bodies, not when bruised with scratches and marred with blood. Impossible. Their safety and her job as a medic to tend to their owwies was first things first to cross her mind.

But now, with their upper bodies clean, unscathed and obviously _nothing else but a sad excuse of fabric to hide them_, she didn't bother to hide her ogling.

Their line of duty did, indeed, have their _lovely_ effects on their strong abdomens and arms and_ just all ove_r as her eyes beholden the various soft, firm dips and slopes that their muscles displayed. God, they're just the exact _definition_ of male sex-appeal.

She exhaled a shallow breath, her mind befuddled as she backed up into the closed door, pinching herself in case this was really an extremely teasing genjutsu, also mapping out a way to get the hell out of her _own goddamn house. _

The door was right behind her. Maybe she could make a quick escape and run away to hide somewhere far, far away. Like a cute castle. Then she could be a princess, wear makeup and fruity-colored dresses with shitloads of glitter on it and hopefully live happily ever after.

But knowing her boys, they'd probably stalk her and bring her back home like always whenever she gets hopelessly lost. Then people would also see her with two guys wearing _for the love of God_ aprons, dragging her to her house, giving out a _very_ wrong idea…

In other words: she's trapped.

And eternally screwed for the day.

"Happy birthday Sakura-chan!" Naruto piped cheerfully, oblivious to her thoughts and turmoil. But she still hardly heard a thing from him, even with his close proximity and heavy voice.

"Dobe planned it," Sasuke grumbled, sounding irritated like he'd been force to do this. Well, yeah. You'd think an last Uchiha, of all people, would get into an apron? A _pink_ _polka dotted_ one no else? _Pfffft. '__I must know the holy secret of accomplishing that feat,'_ she thought absently.

Naruto shrugged, stuffing a hand in his pocket, still facing the rosette. "I just thought we'd do something funny for your birthday."

_'Funny?!'_ she thought exasperatedly, fuming. How in the _fucking_ _universe_ was this considered _funny_? No, this wasn't funny at all!

'_This is just downright sexy,_**'** her inner voice purred instead. But she didn't dare voice that thought out, afraid that it'll boost their already inflated egos. A man's pride should never to be tampered with anyways.

Sure, she thinks Sasuke is still as georgeous as he ever was since day one she met him, cool as a cucumber with is seamlessly smooth exterior; and Naruto had filled out quite nicely too, coupled with his boyish charm that never seem to fail to delight her—

"She's not even smiling," Sasuke drawled, not caring if she even did. Maybe.

Wait, when did that prick get so close? When did they _both_ even get close to her for that matter? They were literally arms length from her now, currently intruding in her personal bubble. She blinked at their new proximity. Never in her life had she had the strangest urge to somehow morph and blend into the door and disappear. And it hasn't even been five minutes yet. What a day…

"Aww, but just look at her!" Naruto said, bracing his left hand on the door next to her head, stuffing his right hand in his pocket. "She's so cute when she's all red!" Indeed. He thinks he's never seen so many shades of red appear right in front of him in his life. And on her face too. _Bonus_.

"I wonder why… " Sasuke fixed his right hand on the other side of her head, also stuffing his unoccupied hand in his pocket. "…she's all…"

Their opposite shoulders were touching, loosely ensnaring her. Sakura swallowed, the heat radiating from them making her impossibly fluttered.

"…_red_," the dark ninja drawled teasingly, smirking.

'_They have to be doing this shit to me on purpose. I bet me life on that… maybe,'_ the rosette thought mirthlessly.

And that _smirk_.

That stupid, psychopathic smug smirk finally broke through Sakura's haze. She scowled. Or tried too. Her red face wasn't helping at all with the effect. She probably looked like cherry at this point. A very exhausted, red cherry, if that was even possible. But anything is possible in the world of shinobi.

_Fuck… She was going to murder them from the outside from behind them.  
_

But the two men would disagree, as—with half lidded eyes— they too openly eyed her smaller form that was currently backed up into her door, looking like a puzzled pink kitten, pouting.

The years have been kind to her. Very kind. Her hair grew longer, her figure, her curves, _all_ her curves for that matter, had deepened almost sinfully. Her expressive emerald eyes were large and genuine, a button nose, blushed lips and narrowed, dimpled cheeks all in one unique bundle.

Yeah, before she looked cute. But as years went by, her cuteness took the back seat. She looked stunningly _beautiful _in their eyes.

Too bad she's oblivious to that. And they could tell too.

Will those _other_ halfass excuse for men eying _their_ teammate, smiling, talking, and downright shamelessly _flirting_ with her, making her blush and all smiley and giggly when it's their damn job to do so. The two men wouldn't, _couldn't_ miss the way other men besides themselves would try to subtly touch her, lingering beside her.

_'Those little rat fucks,' _they had thought darkly on those days_._ Sometimes they just wanted to flay the living shit out of those perverts with a _fucking crowbar lit on fire and then light their tiny di—_

No, they weren't jealous. What? _What? _They basically had their own flock of virgins stalking them around, male and female. They were just looking after her. _Yeah… _

And it is _she_ thats suppose to be _jealous _of _them_! So Naruto came up with an little plan for the both of them to _show_ what Sakura's oblivious to. And on her special day, no less—

They felt her small, soft hands weakly push them away, bringing them back to reality and out of their _oh so good_ thoughts.

"Listen, you half naked _bastards…_" she seethed. But they were use to it. Damn it.

"All I want is to do is sleep. Not so much to ask for, right?" she fisted the soft fabric of their apron in her hands.

"Now why don't you just—"

"Aww Sakura-chan, don't be so boring!" Naruto said, cutting her off, tilting his head, looking at her with those puppy-dog blue eyes.

"Besides, you can't get much sleep with us around…" Sasuke shrugged, hitching his shoulder upwards.

Sakura's eyes dilated.

_…You can't get much sleep with us around…_

It sounded like casual innocence from Sasuke; but the thoughts Sakura were thinking was anything but.

'_Holy shit…_' her inner thought, hazy. Man, she can see it now. What a sinful birthday _really_ would look like—

"And I think you already know that," they said in unison, oddly quiet.

Oh god. Were they thinking the _same_—

"Are you two done now?" said a nonchalant voice from the kitchen.

Sakura vaguely remembered how to breath again, her head snapping at the direction of the voice. Yet _another_ familiar deep voice.

_Kakashi. _Was he hiding all this time, letting them do away with her?

_'Bastards. All of them!' _Sakura thought, her mind deep in despair.

But she was sure he could help her. She snapped her head in his direction, but she just stared at him too, the words she was about to say were viciously murdered inside her throat.

Apron. He had on an apron too. _'A simple blue one at that…'_

_'What the fuck is wrong with the world?' _But she didn't care anymore, apron cladded or not. She needed to be recused from two extremely hot guys. Which made no sense to any other woman/man who would wanna get in their pants. Which wasn't the sexiest case for her.

"S-Sensei!" she called helplessly, regaining back her words. "Sensei, help!" she placed her chin on their joined shoulders, pleading, like she was _literally_ trapped in a man made cell.

"I'm being eye raped_ like hell! _Do something, you _old pervert_! Oh lord, ANYTHING."

Kakashi only chuckled, ignoring her, use to seeing his two boys bother his other little girl.

He pouted from under his mysterious mask, realizing that she no more was his tiny genin. She's grown so much, even thought she's never inched in height since her late teens. He thinks he gonna cry now.

Thats why he wants to give her something to remember him, in case she ever moves away from him to marry some horny bastard and make tons of babies without his _goddamn permission_. Like hell.

"Happy birthday Sakura!" Kakashi chanted lightly despite the anger boiling inside of him of the idea of his Sakura being whisked away, holding up his present, eyes crinkled.

_"Ugrh, dammit!" _she groaned in frustration, noticing he not gonna move from his spot to save h—

_Wait._

That '_present_' in his hand. A book.

_An orange book at that. __It's—_

_"_Icha… _Icha_…_" _she murmured detachedly.

"Adults gotta read adult things, you know," he said, eyes still crinkled. "And I know for a _fact_ you like to read," Kakashi put down the book—Sakura dimly noted the tiny bow around it, and signed from the late Jiraiya too…— on her table.

Figures. Why hadn't she seen this coming? '_Shoot me_…'

"Your giving her that stupid smut?" Sasuke said, raising a fine eyebrow while Naruto lulled his head back, laughing. They had withdrew from Sakura, no longer pinning her. But she barley noticed, still eyeing that book in stunned disgust.

"Your going to plague her of whatever innocence she has left in that pink head…"

"Hey, it's actually a really good book! I gotta admit, Pervy sage did one helluva job," Naruto argued, grinning, while twirling some of Sakura's hair around his finger. Sasuke was mildly appalled.

"Like master like student, I suppose," Sasuke sighed, placing a firm hand on his polka dot clad hip. Why is he even surprised?

Naruto snorted. "Speak for yourself, teme."

Sasuke bristled. He was nothing, _nothing_ like that snake-pedo. He was about to sneer at the foolish blond when Sakura openly sniffed the air.

"Is something burning?" Sakura wondered out loud, panicking.

And if on cue, Kakashi yelped from the kitchen. "Ah! _Burned it!_"

"Damn it sensei! How long did you leave it inside the over for?" Naruto rebuked. Sakura stared at them in confusion.

There was silence from the older man.

"I… don't know," Kakashi sheepishly laughed. Sasuke rolled his eyes, heading for the kitchen to check on him. Sakura watched the taught muscles in his exposed back move with every step warily until he was out of sight. She blinked, turning to face Naruto in question.

"What are you guys doing?"

"Baking you a cake! Or at least, trying too," Naruto said, lips curling in a sheepish smile.

Then it dawned on her. "Oh, so that's what the aprons are for…" Sakura blurted out loud, understandingly.

"Huh, yeah," he said airily, absentmindedly. He then gave her a wicked look. "What did you think it was for, Sakura-chan?" Oh. _Fuck._

_"Oh!" _she laughed forcefully. Even that sounded fake to her. More heat raised in her cheeks, if that was even possible. She thinks she might even pass out right there and then from all that blood concentration forming in her head._  
_

"You know… Erm," _I thought you and that other prick were going to do some serious airborne pole dancing that only my inner fantasies can possibly accomplish in that colorful fabric._

He dipped his head."No, I don't know._ Tell me." _But he knew what she was thinking right off the bat. Please, who wouldn't be thinking about his sexiness wrapped up in an equally sexy apron? _Puh-lease…_ Naruto's look turned sly. Now he can only get his crush to say that…

Sakura just stared at him cautiously, eyes slightly narrowed in apprehension.

Why was he whispering, like they were telling each other dark secrets? Never mind that. She needed to get away from him. Like. _Now_.

And as if whoever the hell was beyond the clouds up there heard her pitiful pleads, a crash was heard inside the kitchen, thankfully distracting Naruto, turning his deep azure gaze away from her. She exhaled. Breathing never felt so good…

"It said 425 degrees! _Not 525!_ Read the directions like you would read that smut, _Kakashi! _Wait, where's that box? Was it even 425? _UGRH._"

They heard a laugh. "Somebody sounds sexually frustrated," their sensei said lightly, amused. "When's the last time you got layed?"

More banging insued. Sakura suddenly went livid.

"They better not break shit in there before I break up _their_ shit," she growled, rolling up her sleeves. Naruto laughed nervously.

Then he remembered something. "Oh, I forgot!" Naruto suddenly stopped her, gently grabbed her arm, halting her. Murderous greens met twinkling blues.

"You gotta help us do this!" he said, ignoring her anger as he knew how to quell it. He was good at that after all. And at a _lot_ of things, except—

"Teach us to bake Sakura-chan! It'll be lots of fun! I think one of us threw away the box with the instructions too…"

Sakura looked at him in disbelief. "Its my birthday! I can't do that! Your suppose to make it _for_ me!" Again, the world. Backwards_._

"Says who?" he smiled. "It's the thought and all that mushy-love from us altogether is what counts, right? You know, the old team back together, like old times! Besides, whether it's your birthday or mine or teme's or _anybody's_, it wouldn't be as much meaningful or fun with one of us missing." His smile grew wider, sure of himself.

"It just wouldn't be the same, Sakura-chan. So please?"

Sakura opened her mouth, again speechless by his earnest response and his child like plead to end it all off. Instead, she just sighed and smiled, allowing him to pull her along, grinning.

And with that, the silly blonde Hokage dragged her off into making her _own_ birthday cake—even though they probably don't even know what an egg looks like and might blow up the kitchen in the end of it all, eventually creating a bigger mess than she needed—pulled her off to the kitchen along side with his pseudo-psychopathic ANBU leader, and their perverted ex-sensei/father figure, all three of them each sporting her colorful aprons.

_'__Best present ever…'_ she decided mentally, a wobbly smile in place just thinking about the beautiful disaster ahead.

But it would be alright. Screw sleep. She grinned with newfound energy.

It was her birthday after all. So let them make a holy mess and ruin her kitchen. They'll clean it up, _together,_ anyways.

Now, where did her own apron go?

。。。

* * *

**A/N: Happy **(super late)** Birthday Sakura-chan!**

Procrastinated so hard. This is why it's late. Sorry, lol. I really can't do deadlines... But I just wanted this to come out of my hard-drive. This isn't looked over too, but just by me. Let me know for any mistakes please! Hoped you likey likey anyways.

Kindly R&R?

_Ciao._

_(Edited: 4/24/14) Cleaned it up a little; fixed grammatical errors; added a few snippets of words in between._


End file.
